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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Nick has suggested a Jokes Section so here goes. Knock at the door. "Excuse me Sir, is this a picture of your wife?" "Yes it is." Well I am sorry to say it looks like she has been in a car accident." "Yes I know but she has a lovely personality."
 

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Oh dear Alex You shouldn't have encouraged me by liking my joke!! So here's another one, alas not about cars thought.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Yorkshireman wearing a catflap.
which reminds me:

I have sex daily

No, sorry........

I have dyslexia
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
which reminds me:

I have sex daily

No, sorry........

I have dyslexia
We are probably going to get reported now so in for a penny, in for a pound - Did you hear about the man who went to the Doctor, completely naked and wrapped in clingfilm. The doctor asked what was wrong with him and then said It's okay, I can clearly see your nuts.
 

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Was the butt of my first Duster joke today - someone waved a yellow cloth at me and said "I've got a Duster too".

I guess we'll get used to it.
 

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Was the butt of my first Duster joke today - someone waved a yellow cloth at me and said "I've got a Duster too".

I guess we'll get used to it.
Perhaps we should all adopt Mrs. Brown's response of "That's nice" ---- by which she really means "please remove yourself from my presence in short jerky movements", or some shortening of that sentence.

;-)

****
 

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A man walks into a bar and says ......

... Ouch

Ba da boom ...

:wacko: :blink: :p
 

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Cucrodh Do The DNA have a motto of "Dyslexics of the World Untie"?

****
 

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Best joke I heard in the last couple of weeks went as follows:

"Ordered a new car mate?"

"Yes, a Dacia Duster"

"They're crap"

"Why?"

"They just are, everybody's saying it"

"Who?"

"People"

"Which ones?"

"I just heard it."

"From who?"

"I can't remember"

So much for research then.

"Why don't you get a Qashqai?"

"They're six to seven grand more, smaller and I'm not a beautician or a hairdresser"

"Yeah but its a better car, it's a Nissan"

That's when my sides split.

It got funnier.

"I wouldnt waste my money on a Dacia."

"Why?"

"I just wouldn't"

At this point I realised he was unlikely to have a degree or other qualification that would have developed in him a well honed ability

to base his point of view on well researched facts and a balanced argument.

He, by the way, owns a second hand BMW that drinks fuel like an alcoholic in a brewery and hardly drives it because it's too expensive. So to cut a long story short, he has a very expensive frame for a BMW badge on his drive.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
I know just what you mean, people seem to view Dacias the way I used to view Skodas, but hey, Skodas have come up in the world. And for every numpty who has sniggered at my choice, there has been another person who has said Wow, saw the ads,can't believe you're getting that much car for £8995. I haven't disillusioned them by saying Well actually, by the time you go for the high end spec and the metallic paint and the car alarm etc, you're nearer 14 grand.But I'm still not spending as much as the 3 month old Mondeo Titanium I almost bought until I saw that Do The Maths ad.
 

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I've had pretty much the same reaction and then people look at you when you say the Duster's 1.5 diesel engine is the same as in the Qashquai and the Mercedes A Class and the car's reputation for reliability and selling figures (in Germany of all places!) has been up there with the best. People just need to look beyond a badge and do their homework before making judgements.

Oh and.......

Q: If there's a green ball in your right hand and a green ball in your left hand what have you got?

A: Kermit's undivided attention.......
 

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I know just what you mean, people seem to view Dacias the way I used to view Skodas, but hey, Skodas have come up in the world. And for every numpty who has sniggered at my choice, there has been another person who has said Wow, saw the ads,can't believe you're getting that much car for £8995. I haven't disillusioned them by saying Well actually, by the time you go for the high end spec and the metallic paint and the car alarm etc, you're nearer 14 grand.But I'm still not spending as much as the 3 month old Mondeo Titanium I almost bought until I saw that Do The Maths ad.
The worst I've heard is, "I've never heard of those" but when they see it they say something along the lines of "YOU ONLY PAID HOW MUCH???? OMG WHAT A BARGAIN"

Little boy gets home from school and says "Dad, I've got a part in the school play as a man who's been married for 25 years."
His Dad replies "Never mind Son. Maybe next time you'll get a speaking part!!"
 
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